1
00:00:05,355 --> 00:00:07,801
Yo, C, can you take me to the beach, man?
2
00:00:09,195 --> 00:00:12,358
Will, you gonna take that
baseball to the beach with you?
3
00:00:12,595 --> 00:00:15,280
No, no, see, this isn't just a baseball.
4
00:00:15,835 --> 00:00:18,725
This is autographed
by "Say Hey" Willie Mays.
5
00:00:18,795 --> 00:00:22,242
I mean, I had to sell half your
coin collection just to buy it.
6
00:00:23,035 --> 00:00:25,356
Well, if you asked me, you're obsessed.
7
00:00:25,875 --> 00:00:27,081
L'm obsessed?
8
00:00:28,315 --> 00:00:31,762
Look, Carlton, you hurt his feelings.
Now, say sorry. Say it!
9
00:00:33,115 --> 00:00:36,403
L'm sorry. Will, seek help.
10
00:00:36,715 --> 00:00:38,843
Look, Carlton, can you just drop me off
at the beach?
11
00:00:38,915 --> 00:00:41,680
You know what, scratch that.
Drop me off a couple blocks away.
12
00:00:41,755 --> 00:00:45,362
The honeys might get a little
nervous if they see rne with a midget.
13
00:00:47,275 --> 00:00:49,323
Will, today is Senior Day.
14
00:00:49,395 --> 00:00:53,161
We're supposed to work on our college
applications and think about our futures.
15
00:00:53,235 --> 00:00:56,717
I am, and it's just that my future involves
a sweet, young thing in a thong.
16
00:00:56,795 --> 00:01:00,322
You know what l'm saying? You know?
Come on, let's jet, peewee.
17
00:01:00,395 --> 00:01:04,286
Forget it, Will. l'm not going to the beach.
l'm going to the library.
18
00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:06,760
Oh, really?
19
00:01:07,835 --> 00:01:11,442
Well, I got ten spankies here that said
you're going to the beach.
20
00:01:14,795 --> 00:01:16,240
They lied.
21
00:02:30,555 --> 00:02:32,796
G, can you please take me to the beach?
22
00:02:32,875 --> 00:02:35,560
So sorry, Master William,
l'm on a break.
23
00:02:37,795 --> 00:02:39,718
G, when is it going to be over?
24
00:02:39,795 --> 00:02:41,559
When you get another ride.
25
00:02:43,035 --> 00:02:47,006
Good morning, sweetheart.
Geoffrey, my bags are upstairs.
26
00:02:47,075 --> 00:02:48,645
How thrilling for you!
27
00:02:49,435 --> 00:02:51,676
Geoffrey, you know l'm very,
very fond of you.
28
00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:54,884
But I am also eight months pregnant,
and I am not in a very good mood.
29
00:02:54,955 --> 00:02:59,005
I could very easily rip out your heart,
eat it, and then have a cappuccino.
30
00:02:59,795 --> 00:03:01,763
Am I making myself quite clear?
31
00:03:02,035 --> 00:03:04,561
Hallmark couldn't have put it any better.
32
00:03:07,035 --> 00:03:09,959
You know, Aunt Viv, l'm really going to
miss you this weekend.
33
00:03:10,035 --> 00:03:12,925
No, you're not, and l'm not going
to miss you, either.
34
00:03:12,995 --> 00:03:16,238
Vivian, sweetheart, there was an army
ofants in my shower this morning.
35
00:03:16,315 --> 00:03:18,443
Welcome to the club, Philip.
Call the exterminator.
36
00:03:18,515 --> 00:03:19,516
And while you're at it, call...
37
00:03:19,595 --> 00:03:20,960
the garage door people and the plumber.
38
00:03:21,035 --> 00:03:22,525
I thought you were gonna
take care of that.
39
00:03:22,595 --> 00:03:26,600
Philip, l'm as big as a house.
All I want to do is lie in bed and eat pie.
40
00:03:27,155 --> 00:03:29,886
Me, too, but I still get things done.
41
00:03:32,595 --> 00:03:35,166
Guess what?
You're not going to believe this.
42
00:03:35,235 --> 00:03:37,124
You paid for your own dinner.
43
00:03:37,235 --> 00:03:41,524
Are you insane? l'm going to be
interviewed by the L.A. Weekly.
44
00:03:41,715 --> 00:03:45,242
Now that l'm a famous weather girl,
people want to know the real me.
45
00:03:45,315 --> 00:03:48,842
Now, if anyone asks,
l'm 21 and I fought in Desert Storm.
46
00:03:51,875 --> 00:03:54,321
Madam, l've put your luggage
in the limousine.
47
00:03:54,395 --> 00:03:58,400
Okay, goodbye, sweetheart. All right,
l'll give John and Sheryl your love...
48
00:03:58,475 --> 00:04:01,285
and I promise l'll try and come back
in a better mood...
49
00:04:01,355 --> 00:04:02,925
ifl come back at all.
50
00:04:03,715 --> 00:04:07,640
You know, Uncle Phil, if we're lucky,
she'll come back as Clair Huxtable.
51
00:04:12,195 --> 00:04:14,357
Look, a black Howdy Doody.
52
00:04:16,195 --> 00:04:19,961
That is my assistant, Edward.
Shame on you, Will.
53
00:04:20,075 --> 00:04:21,156
God!
54
00:04:23,595 --> 00:04:25,996
Good morning, Howdy... Edward.
55
00:04:27,035 --> 00:04:31,040
Good morning, Judge Banks.
I hope you don't mind the imposition...
56
00:04:31,115 --> 00:04:33,561
but I thought you could review your notes
on the way to court.
57
00:04:33,635 --> 00:04:36,718
Edward, even I can't drive
and read at the same time.
58
00:04:36,955 --> 00:04:40,721
Sure you can, Uncle Phil.
I do it every morning on the way to school.
59
00:04:48,475 --> 00:04:51,957
Actually, I took the liberty of putting
your notes on tape.
60
00:04:52,275 --> 00:04:55,245
Thank you, Edward.
It must have taken you hours.
61
00:04:55,435 --> 00:04:56,596
Three days.
62
00:04:56,875 --> 00:05:00,436
But I found it extremely enlightening,
not to mention rewarding.
63
00:05:00,515 --> 00:05:01,596
Yeah.
64
00:05:01,675 --> 00:05:03,518
Oh, I almost forgot one thing.
65
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:06,519
If it's your nose, I think I know
where you left it.
66
00:05:11,555 --> 00:05:13,478
I was hoping to have a day off.
67
00:05:13,555 --> 00:05:15,717
I have an interview with a very prestigious
law firm.
68
00:05:15,795 --> 00:05:18,719
I have a very busy day today,
Edward, can't you postpone it?
69
00:05:18,795 --> 00:05:21,162
- Of course. l'd be happy to.
- Okay.
70
00:05:21,235 --> 00:05:23,442
L'll just wait another eight months.
71
00:05:23,635 --> 00:05:25,478
Go to the interview, Edward.
72
00:05:25,955 --> 00:05:28,276
Thank you, sir. Thank you again.
73
00:05:28,355 --> 00:05:30,483
And again, and again.
74
00:05:30,555 --> 00:05:33,126
Ed, do you want me to get you some
knee pads?
75
00:05:35,315 --> 00:05:38,922
Mr. Banks, the gardener left this for you.
76
00:05:39,555 --> 00:05:42,718
"Dear Mr. Banks, how can I put this?
Your wife is crazy, and you're cheap.
77
00:05:42,795 --> 00:05:44,524
"L quit, adios, Hector."
78
00:05:45,315 --> 00:05:46,441
Great, just what I need.
79
00:05:46,515 --> 00:05:48,005
Can I be ofassistance, sir?
80
00:05:48,075 --> 00:05:51,079
Yes, you can now call a gardener,
call an exterminator...
81
00:05:51,155 --> 00:05:53,601
find a plumber, and fix the garage door.
82
00:05:53,955 --> 00:05:56,481
Even Aladdin only got three wishes.
83
00:05:59,435 --> 00:06:00,596
What am I going to do?
84
00:06:00,675 --> 00:06:03,997
How am I gonna make it through the day
without an assistant?
85
00:06:07,315 --> 00:06:09,886
- Yeah, well, gotta go.
- Not so fast, Will.
86
00:06:10,515 --> 00:06:12,165
I really need your help.
87
00:06:12,955 --> 00:06:15,606
Uncle Phil, Uncle Phil.
Look, you know you my man, right?
88
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:18,406
But come on, today is Senior Day.
I got to go down to the beach...
89
00:06:18,475 --> 00:06:19,601
and harass young women.
90
00:06:19,675 --> 00:06:23,646
Will, sometimes you have to put yourself
aside and do something to help others.
91
00:06:23,715 --> 00:06:25,524
You know, you right, Uncle Phil.
92
00:06:25,595 --> 00:06:28,599
And I see it. lt's like a vision.
l'm going to do that when l'm 30.
93
00:06:28,675 --> 00:06:31,758
Will, l'll never make it through this day
without help.
94
00:06:31,835 --> 00:06:36,159
Come on, like my father used to say to me,
"lt's better to give than to receive."
95
00:06:37,475 --> 00:06:40,718
Your pop had a bit of a
drinking problem though, didn't he?
96
00:06:43,715 --> 00:06:46,480
Get out of those clothes
and get in the damn car.
97
00:06:47,035 --> 00:06:49,800
A gentleman would at least give
rne dinner first.
98
00:06:56,275 --> 00:06:58,084
And if you want to stay out ofjail...
99
00:06:58,155 --> 00:07:02,365
I suggest you stop associating
with known criminals and low-life scum.
100
00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:06,636
Jamal?
101
00:07:07,395 --> 00:07:08,556
Will!
102
00:07:12,235 --> 00:07:15,682
What's happening, man?
Yo, man, you cool, that's my uncle.
103
00:07:15,755 --> 00:07:18,281
- Hey, Uncle Phil, this is--
- The defendant.
104
00:07:18,795 --> 00:07:21,526
- Sit down, Will.
- My fault. Sorry.
105
00:07:23,155 --> 00:07:24,998
Hey, Jamal, why don't you offer him
this Kit Kat--
106
00:07:25,075 --> 00:07:26,201
Will!
107
00:07:30,355 --> 00:07:31,925
Next case.
108
00:07:33,475 --> 00:07:34,965
Where are my files?
109
00:07:35,795 --> 00:07:38,366
I got them right here for you, Uncle Phil.
110
00:07:38,715 --> 00:07:41,525
You know, I just cleaning them up a
little bit, you know.
111
00:07:41,595 --> 00:07:44,360
- Why?
- I don't know, man.
112
00:07:44,435 --> 00:07:47,166
Some fool spilled some Slurpee or
something on them, I don't know.
113
00:07:47,235 --> 00:07:49,044
They cool, though.
114
00:07:50,755 --> 00:07:54,760
The People versus Luther Devans,
case number 3612.
115
00:08:07,475 --> 00:08:11,366
What's up, baby? Why don't you stenog
your number down for me, you know?
116
00:08:13,075 --> 00:08:17,524
Girl, you look so good, I wish I could plant
you and grow a whole field of you all.
117
00:08:18,595 --> 00:08:20,597
Will, would you approach the bench,
please?
118
00:08:20,675 --> 00:08:23,997
- Yeah, just a second, Uncle Phil--
- Get your butt over here.
119
00:08:30,835 --> 00:08:33,361
Closer. Come on, a little closer.
120
00:08:33,715 --> 00:08:35,797
Come on. Come on.
121
00:08:35,915 --> 00:08:37,440
- Yes?
- Come on.
122
00:08:39,835 --> 00:08:42,076
May I remind you
that you are here to help me...
123
00:08:42,155 --> 00:08:43,236
not help yourself?
124
00:08:43,315 --> 00:08:46,205
Now, you sit your butt down
over there and shut up.
125
00:08:49,155 --> 00:08:51,044
Kong not h?PPY-
126
00:09:03,755 --> 00:09:06,042
Well, Counselor...
127
00:09:06,635 --> 00:09:10,003
I see that your client has violated
probation again.
128
00:09:10,515 --> 00:09:12,119
Why hasn't he found a job yet?
129
00:09:12,195 --> 00:09:15,039
He's tried, Your Honor,
but he hasn't been able to.
130
00:09:15,115 --> 00:09:17,163
We're here to request more time.
131
00:09:17,555 --> 00:09:21,276
Mr. Devons, I see you've served five years
in the penitentiary.
132
00:09:21,595 --> 00:09:23,518
L'm sure you learned a trade in there.
133
00:09:23,595 --> 00:09:25,359
Actually, I wrote a book, Your Honor.
134
00:09:25,435 --> 00:09:27,005
Word? That's kind of fly, man.
135
00:09:27,075 --> 00:09:30,477
Tell that to the publishers who
rejected me. I hate rejection.
136
00:09:30,755 --> 00:09:33,565
As a matter of fact, I wrote a book
of poetry about it.
137
00:09:33,635 --> 00:09:34,841
Mr. Devons...
138
00:09:35,915 --> 00:09:40,159
I find it difficult to believe that you've put
forth an honest effort to find employment.
139
00:09:40,235 --> 00:09:42,476
L'm willing to take any kind ofjob,
Your Honor.
140
00:09:42,555 --> 00:09:44,762
L'm good with my hands, I can fix
practically anything.
141
00:09:44,835 --> 00:09:46,200
Then why are you unemployed?
142
00:09:46,275 --> 00:09:49,006
L'm an ex-con.
Nobody wants to hire an ex-con.
143
00:09:49,075 --> 00:09:52,079
Oh, please, that's a very lame excuse,
Mr. Devons.
144
00:09:52,275 --> 00:09:56,439
Are you aware that l'm perfectly within
my rights to send you back to prison?
145
00:09:57,755 --> 00:09:59,086
Yo, Uncle Judge.
146
00:10:03,875 --> 00:10:05,877
Uncle Phil, you could give him a job.
147
00:10:05,955 --> 00:10:07,878
Are you crazy? He's an ex-con.
148
00:10:10,555 --> 00:10:13,638
Come on, Uncle Phil. All that stuff
that's broken around the house?
149
00:10:13,715 --> 00:10:17,800
And plus, l'm telling you, I got a good
feeling about this guy. Look at him.
150
00:10:19,835 --> 00:10:21,997
I don't think that would work, Will.
151
00:10:22,355 --> 00:10:25,199
Uncle Phil.
Remember what your pop said...
152
00:10:25,995 --> 00:10:28,601
"'Tis better to give than to receive."
153
00:10:30,115 --> 00:10:32,686
I really, really hate you.
154
00:10:34,595 --> 00:10:36,324
Love you, too, Uncle Phil.
155
00:10:41,115 --> 00:10:43,436
Yo, check it out, G, my Willie Mays
just went up again.
156
00:10:43,515 --> 00:10:45,563
I can get 300 spankies for this.
157
00:10:45,635 --> 00:10:47,922
$225, tops.
158
00:10:49,275 --> 00:10:51,164
I tried selling it yesterday.
159
00:10:52,275 --> 00:10:55,245
And when you finish mowing the lawn,
you can prune Mrs. Banks' roses.
160
00:10:55,315 --> 00:10:56,396
My pleasure.
161
00:10:56,475 --> 00:10:59,160
I have a date tonight, so would you mind
washing the car?
162
00:10:59,235 --> 00:11:01,920
And can you jack up the driver's seat
a little?
163
00:11:04,915 --> 00:11:07,759
And could you pick up my dress from
the dry cleanefs?
164
00:11:07,835 --> 00:11:11,840
While you're at it, could you type up your
thoughts on the industrial revolution?
165
00:11:11,915 --> 00:11:14,680
You know, double space it
and put my name on it?
166
00:11:16,795 --> 00:11:20,038
You dribble and you shoot, you know,
you hope for the best. What, what?
167
00:11:20,115 --> 00:11:23,915
L'll take care of everything right away,
and thanks again for the work.
168
00:11:24,435 --> 00:11:26,802
Hey, there's more where that came from.
169
00:11:28,555 --> 00:11:30,000
What a great guy.
170
00:11:30,075 --> 00:11:31,964
Incredible!
171
00:11:32,435 --> 00:11:34,483
L'm telling you, the dude got it going on.
172
00:11:34,555 --> 00:11:37,638
I mean, especially after spending
five years in the pen.
173
00:11:43,115 --> 00:11:46,801
The pen?
Please tell rne that's slang for the Valley.
174
00:11:49,635 --> 00:11:54,402
Look, now, don't everybody overreact,
but he did serve some time for burglary.
175
00:11:54,795 --> 00:11:56,843
Are you out of your damn mind?
176
00:12:00,235 --> 00:12:01,521
Ashley?
177
00:12:05,155 --> 00:12:08,762
Oh, my God, l've got to make myself
look less attractive.
178
00:12:09,995 --> 00:12:12,316
I know, l'll put on something of Mom's.
179
00:12:13,355 --> 00:12:15,722
L'm nailing down all of my dolls right now.
180
00:12:15,795 --> 00:12:17,718
- Me, too!
- Hey, hold it. Hold it!
181
00:12:18,675 --> 00:12:21,519
- Now the man has paid his debt to society.
- Yeah.
182
00:12:21,595 --> 00:12:23,836
He deserves a second chance,
like everybody else.
183
00:12:23,915 --> 00:12:26,395
- Whose idea was this?
- His.
184
00:12:28,035 --> 00:12:31,039
Will, you have put this entire family
in danger.
185
00:12:31,115 --> 00:12:33,595
This is the dumbest thing
you've ever done.
186
00:12:35,075 --> 00:12:37,476
Will, you are a genius.
187
00:12:37,555 --> 00:12:39,683
Luther is a godsend.
188
00:12:39,835 --> 00:12:44,159
He fixed all of the bulbs on my vanity
mirror. l'm even prettier than I thought.
189
00:12:46,195 --> 00:12:48,402
You know, Hilary, I don't even think
it's possible...
190
00:12:48,475 --> 00:12:50,876
for you to be prettier than you thought.
191
00:12:51,395 --> 00:12:53,204
Thank you, Will.
192
00:12:54,275 --> 00:12:57,722
Will, I fixed that TV in your room.
By the way...
193
00:12:57,795 --> 00:13:01,163
-you now get the Playboy channel.
- My man!
194
00:13:04,955 --> 00:13:06,445
I don't know, Will.
195
00:13:06,955 --> 00:13:10,198
I don't think l'd leave a convicted felon
alone in my room.
196
00:13:10,275 --> 00:13:12,960
But, what could you possibly
have of any value?
197
00:13:13,075 --> 00:13:14,918
What you talking about, man?
198
00:13:15,315 --> 00:13:17,044
How about for instance...
199
00:13:17,395 --> 00:13:19,523
my Willie Mays baseball.
200
00:13:23,955 --> 00:13:28,085
Look at the time, 4:00 already.
I better get some sleep.
201
00:13:29,675 --> 00:13:32,565
Where's my Willie?
Carlton, I can't find my Willie.
202
00:13:41,875 --> 00:13:45,084
Carlton, tell me that there's a baseball
in this thing.
203
00:13:45,915 --> 00:13:47,679
There's no baseball, Will.
204
00:13:47,955 --> 00:13:49,844
I guess you wasn't listening.
205
00:13:50,915 --> 00:13:53,805
Carlton, tell me that there's a baseball
in this thing.
206
00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:57,197
It's gone. Will, Luther's a thief.
What are we going to do?
207
00:13:57,315 --> 00:13:59,477
All right, all right, we don't know
that Luther did it.
208
00:13:59,555 --> 00:14:00,795
Come off it, Will.
209
00:14:00,875 --> 00:14:05,119
If it looks like a duck, smells like a duck
and sounds like a duck, what is it?
210
00:14:05,675 --> 00:14:07,200
Your prom date?
211
00:14:12,635 --> 00:14:14,364
I told you, she had a cold.
212
00:14:17,275 --> 00:14:20,597
Look, if you're so sure Luther didn't
take it, why don't you just ask him?
213
00:14:20,675 --> 00:14:22,404
I mean, he won't have anything to hide.
214
00:14:22,475 --> 00:14:25,843
Come on, Carlton, you can't just walk up
to people and accuse them of stuff.
215
00:14:25,915 --> 00:14:27,440
You think he did it, you ask him.
216
00:14:27,515 --> 00:14:30,962
Right. Like l'm just going to march up to
a vicious, hardened criminal and say...
217
00:14:31,035 --> 00:14:35,404
"Hey, mister, can I have my ball back, and
please don't snap my neck like a twig."
218
00:14:36,795 --> 00:14:40,880
Will, you have to be clever to outthink
the criminal mind.
219
00:14:41,675 --> 00:14:43,643
- Hey, Luther.
- Hey, Luther, how are you doing?
220
00:14:43,715 --> 00:14:44,921
That's Luther.
221
00:14:45,915 --> 00:14:47,804
L'll find out if he's honest.
222
00:14:56,755 --> 00:15:00,396
- Hey, Luther, you dropped your wallet.
- No, that's yours.
223
00:15:03,355 --> 00:15:04,800
So it is.
224
00:15:06,395 --> 00:15:09,478
How honest of you to say so.
225
00:15:14,475 --> 00:15:18,924
So, Luther, basebalfs a fine game, isn't it?
226
00:15:19,475 --> 00:15:20,522
Oh, yeah.
227
00:15:23,435 --> 00:15:24,516
Carlton...
228
00:15:25,115 --> 00:15:27,277
-can I have a word with you?
- Sure.
229
00:15:29,475 --> 00:15:32,957
The word is "idiot," man.
Can't you see he's innocent?
230
00:15:33,515 --> 00:15:37,281
L'm going to buy myself some lumber.
I want to get started on that trellis.
231
00:15:37,355 --> 00:15:41,121
Good for you, Luther.
Look, nice talking to you, Luther.
232
00:15:41,195 --> 00:15:43,357
You're doing a darn good job, Luther.
233
00:15:43,435 --> 00:15:45,676
Look, great having you aboard, Luther.
234
00:15:45,755 --> 00:15:47,484
- Thanks.
- See you, Luther.
235
00:15:48,635 --> 00:15:51,479
- Luther's guilty, Will, l'm going to tell Dad.
- No, you're not, man.
236
00:15:51,555 --> 00:15:53,080
Because if you do, l'm going to tell him...
237
00:15:53,155 --> 00:15:56,125
about them calls you been making
to 1-900-HORNY.
238
00:15:56,195 --> 00:15:57,401
You wouldn't.
239
00:15:57,955 --> 00:16:01,004
- Come on, boys, let's go out to dinner.
- Out? We can't go out.
240
00:16:01,075 --> 00:16:04,443
We got lots of food right here.
We can't leave the house. Our stuff is here.
241
00:16:04,515 --> 00:16:08,918
Carlton, Geoffrey's away, Mom's gone.
If we don't go out to eat, we'll starve.
242
00:16:09,755 --> 00:16:13,840
Come on, let's celebrate. lt's not
every day that Will does something right.
243
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:15,960
You know, Luther's a good worker.
244
00:16:16,035 --> 00:16:19,244
Good thing he worked out,
or l'd have to take it out on your hide.
245
00:16:19,315 --> 00:16:21,966
And that would be nasty, wouldn't it?
246
00:16:22,515 --> 00:16:24,165
Come on, boys, let's go.
247
00:16:25,515 --> 00:16:28,519
Will, we got to tell Dad about Luther.
He might be dangerous.
248
00:16:28,595 --> 00:16:31,724
Carlton, please. Look, the man is innocent.
249
00:16:32,315 --> 00:16:33,680
Trust me.
250
00:16:40,035 --> 00:16:42,606
- What happened in here?
- We was robbed!
251
00:16:42,995 --> 00:16:45,805
Oh, my God, what did they take?
252
00:16:52,435 --> 00:16:56,076
I knew it. I told you we shouldn't
have left Luther here.
253
00:16:57,075 --> 00:17:00,557
Luther did this?
Will, Dad is going to kill you.
254
00:17:00,635 --> 00:17:03,525
Me, why? No, he's not.
255
00:17:03,595 --> 00:17:06,360
I mean, first of all, we don't even
know that Luther did this.
256
00:17:06,435 --> 00:17:10,201
And second ofall, Uncle Phil is a fair man,
he can't blame me for none of this.
257
00:17:10,275 --> 00:17:12,084
Will, l'll kill you.
258
00:17:12,955 --> 00:17:16,118
- Uncle Phil, this ain't my fault, man.
- I don't believe this.
259
00:17:16,195 --> 00:17:18,357
"Why don't you
give him a job, Uncle Phil?"
260
00:17:18,435 --> 00:17:20,642
"l got a good feeling
about him, Uncle Phil."
261
00:17:20,715 --> 00:17:22,683
Look, Uncle Phil, l'm telling you...
262
00:17:22,755 --> 00:17:25,838
there's probably a perfectly good
explanation for all of this.
263
00:17:25,915 --> 00:17:26,996
Like what?
264
00:17:29,675 --> 00:17:33,396
Maybe Luther took all our stuff
to get it Scotchgarded.
265
00:17:35,115 --> 00:17:37,117
- It could happen.
- Shut up.
266
00:17:37,195 --> 00:17:40,802
Any idiot could see he's guilty.
l'm calling the police. God!
267
00:17:42,355 --> 00:17:44,119
My Tevin Campbell posters.
268
00:17:44,195 --> 00:17:47,039
If he touched them,
l'll hunt him down like a dog.
269
00:17:49,995 --> 00:17:53,761
All right, wait a minute.
Come on, let's just calm down here.
270
00:17:54,595 --> 00:17:58,566
I mean, come on.
I mean, what did we lose for real?
271
00:17:58,915 --> 00:18:01,077
A bunch of things.
272
00:18:01,395 --> 00:18:02,885
We're all healthy.
273
00:18:04,755 --> 00:18:06,166
We're all safe.
274
00:18:09,235 --> 00:18:11,920
Where are the video games?
275
00:18:15,315 --> 00:18:17,079
I can't breathe.
276
00:18:23,595 --> 00:18:27,441
- Well, he got all the TVs.
- He got the silverware, too.
277
00:18:27,835 --> 00:18:31,044
I feel like such a fool. He was probably
planning this from day one.
278
00:18:31,115 --> 00:18:33,846
Well, don't blame yourself, big guy.
Blame Will.
279
00:18:35,235 --> 00:18:37,681
He should have told you
when Luther stole his baseball.
280
00:18:37,755 --> 00:18:38,995
What baseball?
281
00:18:39,795 --> 00:18:41,399
What baseball?
282
00:18:42,835 --> 00:18:46,442
Well, baseball game where the man with
the stick hit ball and run.
283
00:18:46,755 --> 00:18:48,166
Sort of like this.
284
00:18:48,235 --> 00:18:49,475
Hold it!
285
00:18:50,555 --> 00:18:53,399
You mean to tell me that Luther stole your
Willie Mays...
286
00:18:53,475 --> 00:18:55,204
and you didn't tell me about it?
287
00:18:55,275 --> 00:18:57,403
I didn't really know, Uncle Phil.
288
00:18:58,355 --> 00:19:02,326
Hey, but, if we want to be serious
about this, this is all your fault.
289
00:19:02,395 --> 00:19:03,760
Excuse me?
290
00:19:03,835 --> 00:19:08,079
If you had let rne go to the beach, then
none of this would have never happened.
291
00:19:10,315 --> 00:19:13,797
Will, I will give you till the count of ten
to get out of my sight.
292
00:19:13,875 --> 00:19:14,956
Nine.
293
00:19:20,075 --> 00:19:23,443
Luther get on my nerves, steal my stuff,
and I get in trouble.
294
00:19:24,155 --> 00:19:27,364
I wish that punk was in here right now,
boy, 'cause l'd...
295
00:19:28,675 --> 00:19:32,441
scream like a girl! Uncle Phil!
Luther's in the house.
296
00:19:32,515 --> 00:19:35,837
Yeah, you're right.
Dig me with my bad self, huh?
297
00:19:35,915 --> 00:19:37,405
What the hell are you doing here?
298
00:19:37,475 --> 00:19:39,682
Let me warn you, Luther,
l've called the police.
299
00:19:39,755 --> 00:19:40,995
You've got a lot of damn nerve...
300
00:19:41,075 --> 00:19:42,406
coming back here after you robbed us.
301
00:19:42,475 --> 00:19:45,319
- What are you talking about?
- Oh, please!
302
00:19:57,355 --> 00:20:01,121
Yeah, if this wall weren't in my way,
mister, you'd be plenty sorry.
303
00:20:03,595 --> 00:20:06,439
After we gave you a second chance.
This is how you repay us?
304
00:20:06,515 --> 00:20:10,486
I did not rob you. You got to believe me.
Will, you believe me, right, man?
305
00:20:10,555 --> 00:20:13,320
Hey, you know, it's people like you that
give ex-cons a bad name.
306
00:20:13,395 --> 00:20:15,318
L'm calling the police, man.
307
00:20:18,635 --> 00:20:20,717
Damn, that was fast.
308
00:20:21,755 --> 00:20:24,679
You know, they must have thought
we was white folks.
309
00:20:25,875 --> 00:20:27,764
- Come on in, Officer.
- Thank you.
310
00:20:27,835 --> 00:20:31,806
Thank God you got here when you did.
I was about to turn this sucker out.
311
00:20:34,235 --> 00:20:36,203
Officer, I want you to arrest this man.
312
00:20:36,275 --> 00:20:38,755
He stole my baseball and some other stuff.
313
00:20:40,355 --> 00:20:42,403
- I can't do that, sir.
- Why not?
314
00:20:42,475 --> 00:20:44,682
We already arrested the perpetrator.
315
00:20:45,155 --> 00:20:48,716
Yes, his name is Edward Haskell,
claims to be your law clerk.
316
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:51,646
Edward! Officer, there must be
some kind of mistake.
317
00:20:51,715 --> 00:20:53,126
L'm afraid not, sir.
318
00:20:53,195 --> 00:20:55,243
Sea, we saw his U-Haul double-parked.
319
00:20:55,315 --> 00:20:57,966
Upon suggesting he move the vehicle,
suspect broke down...
320
00:20:58,035 --> 00:21:00,197
and confessed to cleaning you out, sir.
321
00:21:00,275 --> 00:21:02,118
Why would he want to rob me?
322
00:21:02,315 --> 00:21:05,922
Well, according to him, he's sick and tired
of getting you bagels...
323
00:21:05,995 --> 00:21:08,475
it's not his job to iron your robes...
324
00:21:09,315 --> 00:21:13,877
and he said you unfairly accused him
of calling 1-900-HORNY.
325
00:21:16,475 --> 00:21:18,477
The man is obviously a deviant.
326
00:21:20,515 --> 00:21:22,358
Well, thank you, Officer, and...
327
00:21:22,435 --> 00:21:24,642
l'll meet you down at the station
to make a positive ID.
328
00:21:24,715 --> 00:21:26,444
Very good, thank you, sir.
329
00:21:29,755 --> 00:21:30,961
Luther.
330
00:21:37,155 --> 00:21:39,396
Luther, we're sorry we were wrong.
331
00:21:39,675 --> 00:21:41,040
Tell me about it.
332
00:21:41,235 --> 00:21:43,078
Luther, we're sorry.
333
00:21:43,315 --> 00:21:46,683
Someone in my position should
be a better judge of character.
334
00:21:46,755 --> 00:21:49,326
L'd like for you to continue
to work for us, though.
335
00:21:49,915 --> 00:21:54,796
Well, after working in this house,
jail won't be so bad. See you.
336
00:21:59,755 --> 00:22:03,077
Well, I trust we all have learned
something from this.
337
00:22:04,235 --> 00:22:06,203
Yeah, don't work for you.
338
00:22:07,195 --> 00:22:09,675
Well, we weren't completely wrong
about Luther.
339
00:22:09,755 --> 00:22:12,998
Yes, we were. He didn't touch
my Tevin Campbell posters.
340
00:22:14,235 --> 00:22:16,442
Yeah, but he took Will's baseball.
341
00:22:17,755 --> 00:22:19,996
You mean the one in the plastic case?
342
00:22:21,075 --> 00:22:23,203
I borrowed it for batting practice.
343
00:22:23,715 --> 00:22:26,241
Where is it, Ashley?
That thing is worth a lot of money.
344
00:22:26,315 --> 00:22:28,921
Really, didn't look like it.
345
00:22:28,995 --> 00:22:32,841
Somebody wrote all over it.
But, don't worry, I cleaned it off for you.
346
00:22:35,555 --> 00:22:37,762
Where are those damn
Tevin Campbell posters?
347
00:22:37,835 --> 00:22:38,996
No! No!
348
00:22:46,435 --> 00:22:48,005
You know, man, l'm glad you asked that.
349
00:22:48,075 --> 00:22:51,238
Sea, baseball game where man with stick
hit ball and run.
350
00:22:52,875 --> 00:22:56,118
- Sort of like this.
- Hold it, Will.
351
00:23:05,915 --> 00:23:07,963
- Tlley sin 't noticed. They ain 't noticed.
-0lra y. Olra y.
352
00:23:09,835 --> 00:23:10,882
English